Sweet Hammer Blow

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Proverbs 27:17

Imagine the gruff, sweaty man at work. He pulls the heavy iron tool back and with a loud repeated ‘ping’ hammers hard against the fire-softened metal to sharpen the dull blade. The metal will harden with great accuracy, grandly formed for its precise use.

This image is similar to two companions who have locked arms in life together and are in deep conversation, constructive criticism, loving advice, counsel and differing viewpoints that rub against each other to sharpen their hearts.

However, the sound can also be similar to the harsh ping of the loud morning neighbor in vs. 14, the drip of the quarrelsome wife in vs. 15 and the scratching fingernail against the chalkboard of wounds, anger and jealousy from earlier verses that all hit the target of our hearts with fierce blows upon us.

In either circumstance, I may think I am being squelched from who I really am. Yet, in reality, God is rebuilding me into something better than I was before, THROUGH my circumstances. I stop my inward cries and listen to sweet hammer blows I know are from God. He is forming me even now. My trials happen with His full knowledge and in His timing. They can be used for His purposes. My response to such disappointments is trust in Him. I have been appointed by God to rise above what feels unfair and uncomfortable. In these moments, I realize my adequacy is not found within myself (look at me, I’ve been sharpened) but in a powerful and adequate God, the One behind all that sharpens me. Under every blow, I can be still and know that He is God.

Interactions with people, no matter their good or bad intentions can be managed by our Sovereign God to enhance our usefulness for His sake. Marriage is the closest a person can get to another person, and we are sharpened in our loving experiences, but also in our seasons of despair.

In single-hood, we are sharpened as well. It is our response to the sharpening that is most vital.

I am sharpened by the Bible, nature, circumstances, promptings of the Holy Spirit, books or inspirational movies and by witnessing godliness in the face of painful trials. But this particular verse speaks of how my heart is sharpened or stirred to action by others who have been stirred to action and vice versa.

Generally, we are not sharpened simply by the thoughts that come into our minds. Someone who walks in different shoes and has different experiences than our own can bring to us more insights for better ways to live or they can influence us for wrong.

As I grow older, I am increasingly discovering that surprisingly I am not the center of the universe. Being sharpened is not as much about ME as it is about me being refined for something or someone else. The process of sharpening makes me a blessing (or a curse) to others and greatly moves God’s kingdom forward (or hinders it).

If the iron sharpener could speak, I imagine his voice reflecting back to me my flaws or my apathy or laziness, to name a few. I am seen for the bluntness or dull qualities I possess.

Am I true or am I false, genuine or pretending? Am I only reading about good and godly deeds or am I doing what I know to be right? Upon examining my life, I can now discover the depth of my need to be sharpened.

Hebrews 10:24 says, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.” This verse is perfect in explaining the iron sharpeners we must be for each other.

Sadly, however, there are those who spur me on to self-expression or self-centeredness. I might be strong enough to reject their examples and continue to be refined by God. Yet, eventually, their sharpening may evolve into the opposite of what God desires and I desire for myself. It is wise not to be in the company with them for long periods of time, for they will influence my heart to become more agitated, lazy or angry.

When I spend my time walking with good companions, I can be taught the joy of the Lord instead of depression and complaining. I can be led to paths of honest hard work instead of idleness.

Father, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I. Show me the path to your wiser ways. Use the friends in my life to sharpen me for the good. Likewise, help me to sharpen them. Help us to be better people because of the friends we choose to walk with. In Jesus name, Amen.

Thriving in Contentment

Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy? Prov. 27:4

Today, we add to our knowledge of thriving by learning to abstain from enslavement to one of the worst of our out-of-control emotions. Today we study jealousy.

Anger (covered in last week’s blog) is one of the emotions that generally parades around for all to see. Yet, jealousy is a quiet, stubborn parasite that exploits its host, benefiting itself (or the devil) in the process. It stirs up and spreads hidden toxic damage and is very hard to uproot. When these toxins finally present themselves, others find it difficult to stand before such powerful feelings. Jealousy never gives anything in return.

Jealousy isn’t generated by something from without but from within. It is a dreaded green-eyed creature that entirely takes over when a person entertains even a single grievance. Sad frustrations feed the monster as it grows considerably by the moment.

Perhaps such envy doesn’t become outwardly violent, but it can turn to passive-aggressive irritations and unkindness’s toward those begrudged.

We want something because someone else has it, therefore we nag or complain until we get our wishes. We put aside the purchases we need and use our resources to impulsively buy what we want. We throw away our own God-given talents in pursuit of qualities we see others possess.

What is it that we envy? We envy a person’s house, life, career, spouse, talents, popularity, gentleness, calmness or organization. However, if we were to list our topics of jealousy and then make a list of the qualities or possessions we already have, the list would reveal how well off we really are. Maybe it would open our eyes!

Envy is defined as a discontented or resentful longings, desires or grudges for someone else’s stuff, character, or luck and a deafness to our own current blessings and gifts.

The opposite of jealousy is contentment, generosity or a genuine happiness for other people’s achievements. We have a quiet peace that invades our souls instead of always grabbing for more.

Jealousy happens when a person improperly puts his attention (wants, desires, lust) more on an earthly thing than it should be. It is selfishly motivated, not others-centered. Jealousy takes up the entire mind in obsessive reverence for something that is not God. Instead of worship and praise, the person is worshiping himself or the things he is jealous for.

When I am feeding my jealousy, I cannot be in a state of worship to God. Likewise, when I am feeding my desire to worship, I cannot be in a state of jealousy.

In a state of reverential worship, my mind is submitted to what God wants me to do with what I have. There is no sense of lack. “The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.” Psalm 23.

I asked my husband how he would define jealousy or envy. He felt that it was something born from insecurity. “I’m not good enough. I have to prove myself. The more I achieve or earn, the higher my value. Therefore, I exhaust myself, yearning for what others have or for what I perceive they have. I seek approval and end up giving up my power to others.“

My husband remarked how this dilemma is quite unsatisfying. Even if a person gets what he wants, the attainment is never enough.

The never enough dynamic is so true. A child fights for the toy the other child has, but when he finally gets a turn to play with the toy, he loses interest. It’s not the toy he wanted in the first place!

Envy happens when we want something so badly, we become blinded to how we treat people who get in our way. Sometimes, envy is easy to spot in ourselves. Just follow our irritations and they typically lead us to our jealousies.

Certainly, we may feel justified because of our circumstances. In the Bible, even God was righteously jealous for His people. Anger may be ‘righteous’ at times. However, jealousy must be released eventually, or it will ruin and destroy.

I have discovered a good test to see if what I’m feeling is acceptable or not. I ask myself, “Is this emotion taking me away or moving me closer to God?” Some emotions are led by God and are paving the way for His will. Other times, I must walk away from destructive emotions, such as jealousy.

Lord, rid me of envy. Renew my mind and help me to follow the qualities obtained in the fruit of your Holy Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23). Help me to adopt a right perspective of the things of this world. May I submit to your will and put on true humility and love. Instead of jealousy, teach me to wait on YOU. You provide for me and are all I need. When I receive a desired or hopeful gift, help me not to look at it as something I cling to in order to be happy. May I see it as something granted from your hand, your provision at just the right time. Give me contentment and a waiting, trustful hope, not a demanding spirit, but a letting go. When your gifts are given, may I learn how to soak them in without guilt at the pleasures you give and without discontent in future expectations. Help me to be in-the-moment inside my grateful praise to the Father, the Giver of all good things. Whether I feel needful or not, I am always filled with you. In Jesus name, Amen.

The Blessed Wait

Isaiah 40:31 Those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.

I’ve heard it said that an eagle will teach its young to fly. Both parents guard the nest and take food to the young. At about 11-12 weeks, if the eaglets have not ventured forth, the parent eagle “stirs” or rocks the nest, tipping them out! The young eaglets flap about in panic, still new at flying. The parent eagle carefully watches, waiting for the critical moment. With wings spread wide, the eagle then swoops down underneath those babies and delivers them back to the security of the nest.

Ours is a God of powerful gentleness. Ours is a God whose timing is perfect. Like the parent eagle, He is sensitive to our needs. He knows when the nest has become too comfortable and needs a little stirring. He, too, watches carefully, and, as with spread wings, catches us up, bringing us to Himself. But He wants us to learn from our fluttering & flopping and to mature. He wants us to leave behind our helpless panic and learn to wait on Him. Then, with our eyes on our Father ‘eagle,’ we begin to know what it means to soar on eagle’s wings!

The trials in our lives can teach us how to fly. We may flutter around at first, but we will learn and grow if we keep our eyes on Jesus.

The verse says that those who ‘wait on the Lord’ will renew their strength. Waiting can be defined in many ways:

Looking for treasures in the trial
Sitting with God in the pain
Letting him carry me through it
Letting him build up energy in me to be able to soar above it

Energy is gained not from temporary distractions of the world, but by being carried on the solid wings of Christ and allowing Him to be the power by which I lunge forward and fly.

Waiting on the Lord renews my strength.

When I head out to go running, but haven’t run in several months, I have to build up stamina and strength. I don’t like to run. But running my goal-amount improves my health. At first my muscles are sore from being stretched and pushed. Once I’ve built up stamina I run without getting weary.

It’s the same with trials. I’ve lived long enough to know that trials come and go. They have such huge value in our lives if we let them. They hurt us in the deepest places of our souls where God can be discovered and leaned upon and where we can allow the pain to change us from the inside out, giving us wings to fly.

This week, I took some time to think about what renews me. God works through inspirational movies, books or sermons to reawaken my tired spirit. It’s like my perspective changes, in an instant, and in the exhausting trials, I’m ready to stop complaining and get on with my life in the way He leads me.

Today’s verse is a promise:

Those who wait…shall renew their strength
Shall mount up on wings like eagles
Shall run and not be weary
Shall walk and not faint

Wait means to believe and trust in God’s goodness no matter how bad things seem. Wait means to fix my eyes on Jesus and not on the problem. Wait means to be still. Wait means to stop being controlling, having an agenda, labeling ‘one outcome’ as the only thing to make me happy. Wait is believing in a big God who has a reason for asking me to obey Him in areas I would rather not, like: going the second mile, returning a blessing for a curse, being the first to give a kindness in a relationship of built up walls, speaking softly to one who is angry with me or praying for my enemies.

Notice on whom we are to wait: the Lord. Everything stops with Him. He is my all and all. He is my everything. He is the One I am waiting on during the trial.

In trials, I DO get overwhelmed and weary, but somehow, when I become still in His presence, my breath is restored, and I am able to go forward into another day, even, at times, in joy. His strength is enough.

Father, thank you, thank you for this awesome verse. It breaths life into my soul at a time when I so much need it. Teach me how to better wait on you. Keep my spirit calm, steady and steadfast. Move the mountains out of the way that stand before me. Be my God, and I declare with confidence that you alone are my Jehovah. Thank you for your care and for your saving wings that carry me through my trials. In Jesus name, Amen.

Spread Joy

The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. Proverbs 14:1

To simplify, it is wise to build others up and foolish to tear them down.

Proverbs 14:1 is narrowed to women, but the verse can apply to men and women alike.

There are many ways to “tear the house down.” It’s not just about complaining and nagging. It can also be about focusing too much on self, my plans, feelings, illness or health problems.

How does one change from being destructive to creatively weaving together habits of good, positive and wise ways that help to spread joy.

I have found that the energy for good can come from making choices to simply get up and get busy doing kind deeds and serving others. I am more apt to build others up when I allow my mind to stop dwelling so much on self and my own need for help.

Another way to build good things is by feeding my mind pleasant thoughts. I do this by reading my Bible, along with other books that train me to strengthen whatever is weak inside me (things like finances, marriage, parenting or diet). Listening to inspiring happy music touches and energizes me to do good.

As a wife, I feed my mind with noble thoughts about my husband. I try not to second-guess his motives. I try to be in the moment, not 1000 miles away, and I don’t let distractions take me away from him.

In these ways, I have set a solid foundation to construct a strong building of love, of hope and goodwill.

Father, teach me more every day about how I can be a better builder for your kingdom. I’m sorry for the times I’ve torn people down and have spread darkness instead of light. Show me every day how to encourage, inspire and teach (by example). Make me into a peacemaker who spreads joy to a starving unhappy world. I want to build up and not tear down. Give me wisdom for this most holy task. In Jesus name, Amen.

A Better Life

Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues. Proverbs 10:19

As I pondered today’s verse throughout the week, it encouraged and took me higher.

I learned that not every word falls into the category of sin. In fact, some people want to hear the words that come from our lips.

When my husband calls me over the phone, he’ll get off if I’m not talking very much, because he thinks I’m not interested. He wants to hear about my day and my life.

The right kind of words are valuable: servant-hearted, wise, kind and speaking the truth in love. These are words that help to end sin. I don’t think that plain conversation is the topic of this proverb unless hoarding a conversation is our habit. I think the verse is talking about misplaced words, words that lead to and come from a sinful heart. I know good and well when it’s not the time to talk and my husband needs rest from my words. Sometimes, advice and control aren’t the most welcoming remarks to share.

As the days flew by during the week, I asked myself, “What kind of sins are included in the use of words?“

These answers came to me: Lying and then covering up the lie, prideful or defensive talk about why I am right, fighting for only my way or trying to prove a point without listening to the other side. (Not all defensive talk or fighting is wrong. But, all of it should be addressed with God first so the expression of it doesn’t become sin).

This week I spoke to people at my church, at stores and with family-members. I learned that how I respond in conversations matters. I could spend all my energy defending who I am, to no avail, or I could simply be teachable and kind. It occurred to me that people, in general, want to be helpful. Their intentions are good. At this point, it’s time to stop talking and simply listen.

I learned that whining is a great example of “multiplying words that don’t end sin.” Unnecessary words spoken without being intentional can cause more harm than good.

Another question I asked myself was, “Multiplying doesn’t end sin, so what does?”
Silence (withholding a sarcastic or mean remark)? Carefully worded encouragements and truth?

What about when I multiply my thoughts, as opposed to silencing them? Aren’t my thoughts capable of just as much harm as my words (not outward but inwardly)?

One night this week, I couldn’t sleep. I prayed, “Lord, I can’t seem to silence my thoughts. Please help me.”

The fact is, my words start out as thoughts. Night time is the quietest part of the day when my thoughts come alive the most. God is my helper to guide me to self-control and positive thinking: memorizing His word, prayer, encouragement for loved ones. This good habit prepares me for what will come out of my mouth.

Towards the end of the week, I had moments in which I thought about today’s verse and asked God, “Should I hold my tongue or should I speak?“

It was refreshing to begin the life long process of actually thinking through my thoughts before they were formed into words. There was not a time I felt I went out of bounds with my words. And the moments spent in silence were very helpful. It all felt like progress to lean on God.

Lord, I know that nothing great is accomplished without intentionality and forethought. I’m thankful for your help this week in guiding me further into a better life. Move my thoughts and words to end sin and not continue in it or make matters worse. Help me to learn the value of listening and hearing what others have to say. In Jesus name, Amen.

Lift Up Your Heads

Again, Jesus was talking about some things that would happen at the end of time. And then He said, “When these things begin to take place, stand up and lift up your heads, because your redemption is drawing near” Luke 21:28 NIV.

Other translations say it like this:
“look you, and lift up your heads” ASV
“stand up straight and raise your heads” CEB
“stand up and hold your heads high” (CJB)
“straighten up and raise your heads” (ESV)
“stand with confidence!” GW
“stand tall with your head high” (MSG)
“grieve no longer. Lift up your heads” (WNT)
“bend yourselves back, and lift up your heads” (YLT)
“Hold your head up with joy and hope” (NIRV)

Why?
“Because your redemption is drawing near.”

I have loved this verse all week long. I have loved repeating it, when things seem dark or hopeless. I don’t know when Christ will return, but I am learning in my trials to look up and lift up my head to the only One who can save me.

As my week progressed, I had one moment in time, in particular, that convicted me so deeply, I was moved to look up:

I was in a group of people and because I’m an introvert, sometimes things come out of my mouth simply to be social. Those words may not be my true heart, but I’m just hanging in there because I’m TRYING. Anyway, it had rained all day, so it was obvious that I should comment about our mutual trials in our similar weather-related circumstances. What came out, without me realizing (or even meaning it) was a complaint. Others nodded in agreement as people in a group will do. And, the meeting came and went.
At the end of our session, the guy in charge did what he always did. We gathered in a circle to pray. What came out of his mouth changed my life forever.

“Father, we know that today has been hard for many and the rain has been coming down like crazy. But you are God and we accept it as a blessing from your hand. YOU know best what we need, so we thank you, even for the rain.“

I went home stunned.
I want to hang around people like that.
I want to BE that.
Whether I’m shy or not, I want to see past the complaints of my heart and know my Lord better because of that choice.
I want to straighten up and lift up my head to my Father whose gifts are good.

The other day, I was watching an old rerun of Touched By An Angel. In the episode, a little girl was being mocked at school because she had no father. She ran home and threw herself on her bed. Soon she was creating a drawing with crayons of herself behind prison bars and stuck in a life she didn’t want without a daddy. She attempted to locate him and the episode unfolded even more. In the end, he showed up and all was well.

In this simplistic example, I found myself thinking about our own prison cells and how we feel stuck in the adult situations of our lives. It occurred to me that the answer for our confinement and limitation caused by the outside world (things that are not as easily remedied as in a television show) are also simplistic. We seek our Father (like the little girl) in heaven. We run to Him. That’s it.

“Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows”Matt. 10:29-31.

“Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know” Jer. 33:3.

Our Father is always there. He never abandons us or leaves us alone. He will answer when we call. We may not always recognize His voice or His ways of answering, but He is there.

Lord, I bring you my complaints. I rise above the trials of this life and look up and lift my head to the skies where my help comes. For you, Oh Lord, are my rock, my strength and my hope. To you, Oh Lord, I give my all. You rescue me from my prison cells. You free me in your grace and glory. I thank you, Father, for all you are and all you do.
In Jesus name, Amen.