Spirit Choices (Discernment Series #11)

Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Eph. 4:30-32

Today we will look into another aspect of steering away from our wrong choices (even when we are antagonized). We will learn more about how discernment is really a strong desire to hear God’s Holy Spirit.

This past week my family lost a dear loved one, 89 years old, and of all people who exemplified this strong desire for the Spirit of God, it was her. Her whole life she followed Him. In this, I too, want to take in all I can to grasp how to follow the same path.

The first point I’ll make according to today’s verse is that sadly, we all have it within us to grieve or even quench (I Thess. 5:19) God’s Spirit and thus make terrible decisions. Today’s verse explains some of the ways we do that through our bitterness and anger.

When I use my emotions to hurt or discourage God’s people, the Spirit may be even more grieved than when I fail to perfectly carry out His guidance in discernment (which we’ve studied all this time). In fact, how we spend our time discerning the way we treat His people is probably more important than any other decision.

Before going further in this post, take a moment to read through the entire fourth chapter of Ephesians. List ways the Holy Spirit guides us in discernment in our relationships with others. Write down what discernment is and is not and list qualities you discover that would better define the word itself.

Here is ‘my’ list:

Discernment is urgent, humble, gentle, patient, loving, unified, peace-filled, grace-filled, works- of-service-oriented, joined, building each other up; not dark, not hardened; puts on the new self; not false but true, not speaking unwholesome things; doesn’t grieve the Holy Spirit; not bitter, raging, angry or gossiping, but kind, compassionate and forgiving.

The chapter you just read is all about relationship. In our connections with each other, wisdom tells us that the Spirit may prompt us like He did in the past. But, He may also lead us to take an alternative path, way out of our comfort zones. In other words, yesterday’s discernment in a situation may be different from today’s discernment and then a whole new way of handling it tomorrow. Knowing this helps us to be flexible with how the Spirit leads us in relating to each other and in emptying ourselves of expectations of what we think God wants us to do.

We ask ourselves questions like, how much is too much to speak? What is the right amount of confrontation or revealing of my feelings? Sometimes, the less words the better. We learn to want, more than anything else, what the Spirit wants because of our faith in His goodness. Once we make a decision through the Spirit of God, we don’t look back. In faith, we keep our eyes on Him and go forward.

The second point is simply a few links to help us better understand the Spirit of God. The following links will take you to a few of the devotions in the words of Oswald Chambers – My Utmost For His Highest. They both speak of our desire to follow God’s Spirit.

https://utmost.org/do-not-quench-the-spirit/
https://utmost.org/the-discipline-of-the-lord/

Of course, there are wrong reasons to desire God’s Spirit. This is my third point. In Acts 8:9-25, Simon wanted the gift of the Holy Spirit so he could learn more magic. He wanted power. He was pursuing miracles more than he was pursuing God. Acts 8:18 speaks of how Simon wanted to buy the Holy Spirit for the excitement of the miracle.

Is it possible to confuse my desire for discernment with my desire for a magical experience so that I can gain attention? It is very right to share testimonies, but for only one reason, to glorify God.

We must ask ourselves what our motive is when we share our stories.

Fourth, in the times we feel ‘called’ by God’s Spirit, it is not a moment to enjoy (though we will have pleasure in following the Him), but to work. It is not an opportunity to be comfortable.

When you receive a birthday gift from your best friend, what does that look like? The kindness brings a smile to your lips and makes you feel special and loved. However, the Holy Spirit is not a birthday gift to make you smile. His gift is calling you to a higher plane.

This leads us to the fifth point. After writing in I Corinthians 12 about gifts of tongues and other such things, Paul ends in verse 31 by saying, ^“Now eagerly desire the greater gifts.” What follows is the famous chapter on love. I Corinthians 13 says that the gift of tongues and prophecy are great, but greater still is the gift of loving one another.

As we become aware of our God-given talents, we must remember that the greatest way to expend our energies is to love what is unlovable. We are choosing to be on a higher plane when we love what is hard to love.

We are most alive when we are loving and actively giving. It is the way God made us. When we choose such lives, the Spirit of God moves and acts in and through us in ways that, on our own, we are not capable. Love is our purpose for living. Love promotes godly discernment.

As we continue to fervently feed our desire to become more like Christ and bend with His Spirit for the sake of God’s kingdom and not for our own benefit, Gal. 5:22,23 reveals to us, through the Spirit’s fruit, a way to know that we are truly listening, which is the sixth point. The fruit that speaks of our oneness with Him is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (many of the things we just listed from Eph. 4). Every moment we live, when we lean on the Holy Spirit for truth, His fruit will be brought about in our lives.

The seventh point in the Christian walk and of the Holy Spirit’s presence and fruit within us is to come clean about how much we really want, deep in our souls, to have His rule over our lives. When we are at our wit’s end for guidance, the Holy Spirit can show us the way. But how can He lead us when we are still well-supplied with all sorts of answers of our own.

Our hearts are full of self. They must be emptied.

Discernment is the willingness to start over, start from scratch, to be flexible to hear something different or new and be empty so we can be filled with His wisdom.

When I have no more answers and have come to the end of my rope, it is time to stop thinking, to sit before my Father and simply cry out His name and worship.

Here are the new additions to the Discernment Wheel from last week:

Discernment is:

Luke 18:31 Following this verse as an example of Jesus calling His disciples to a new place
Using love to cast out a spirit of fear
Knowing that some confrontations or truth may better be heard from others, not me
Overseeing a heart of faithfulness vs gossip
Not a promise of great results (or calm), yet I know that I have done his will
Not free from battles (Jesus quoted scripture)
*Doesn’t mean passive; it is important during a conflict to pause (for a time to regroup) in order to have a chance to come to truth and then relay it; then, I speak it with passion
*Not my ability to figure it out
*Not followed through by my power
*Not necessarily about having good feelings

[*These additions aren’t in previous lessons, but added through comments.]

Father, in all my dealings with people, whether loved ones or strangers, lead me through your Spirit. Show me the way to love. Give me the fruit I need in order to show everyone who you are. In my decisions, help me to pause and consider your Holy Spirits guidance in all things. In Jesus name, Amen.