Purer in Heart

The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but people are tested by their praise. Prov. 27:21

Earlier in this chapter, verse 2 says, “Let someone else praise you, and not your own mouth; an outsider, and not your own lips.” We studied this verse several weeks ago and were led to the conclusion that our greatest praise belongs to our Father. All of us, however, for various reasons, will receive praise, and our responses will reveal a lot about us.

Today’s Proverb compares precious metals to precious people and how each is tested. In the refining process, silver and gold are heated to high temperatures until what is not gold or silver rises to the top to be removed. What is left is pure.

When praise comes our way, how might such a seemingly harmless and even wonderful act be like a fire of refining? Some say that it’s not as hard to stand under criticism as it is to stand before praise. There are those who come through their difficult trials with flying colors. Yet, bring honor to them and the result may not be so pure.

Praise can corrupt and ruin a person. So how does one allow the surety of praise to bring the dross to the top of our hearts and let the refining process make us better fit and uncontaminated for God’s kingdom?

We all should go through a self-cleansing process when praise comes to us and let the applause purify our hearts. Part of the self-cleansing is when praise comes to someone else, besides us, let us be glad for them and harbor no envy.

Who will come through the fire? A man of virtue and good morals, a man who transfers the glory to God and a man who desires to become even more godly? Would he become a thankful man for the honor God is bestowing on him? Might he learn to turn the admiration back onto his admirer? This takes humility and a desire to earn the praise he receives. People are always watching. Praise betrays or reveals the deepest parts of who we are, whether we are acceptable or not.

The degree of a person’s good or bad reputation (what people think about him and for what they praise in him) generally gives an idea of his good or bad character. Also, what a bragger himself praises tells a lot about him. Of what does he approve and admire? Good or evil?

Conceited people chase after praise and popularity. Foolish and undisciplined people become pompous. But a wise person, though he appreciates the praise, learns to possess an inner indifference. He knows that having praise speaks of God more than of himself.

How are we praised? I tried to think outside the box for this question:

Besides outright honor, we are praised when someone asks us to pray over them or give them advice. We are praised when we’re asked to speak or mentor others. Believe it or not, we are also praised when we’re given constructive criticism. These words come from a person who loves us. They know we will take what they have to say to heart. That is high praise. Try to think of some ways you are praised and how the praise can go to your head if you’re not careful.

Just a listening friend can be a form of praise. Yet, if we take advantage of that friend-given praise by interrupting or dismissing their feedback, the gift they are giving us is harmed.

There is much refining that needs to be done through all praise. One purifying process happens when we get angry at another person for receiving the praise we think we deserve.

Samuel 18:6-8 says, “When the men were returning home after David had killed the Philistine, the women came out from all the towns of Israel to meet King Saul with singing and dancing, with joyful songs and with timbrels and lyres. As they danced, they sang: ‘Saul has slain his thousands, and David his tens of thousands.’
…Saul was very angry; this refrain displeased him greatly.”

In fact, Saul came up with a plan to falsely praise David by handing over his daughter to him in marriage. His intent was to make him a part of his army and send him out to battle, letting the enemy kill him.

I Samuel 18:18 says, “But David said to Saul, “Who am I, and what is my family or my clan in Israel, that I should become the king’s son-in-law?”

David, who did not know Saul’s intent, is an example of humility in the face of honor.

Father, refine me through the pleasant gift of praise. Let my heart be found to be like gold or silver. Let me pass the test. Remind me so I can escape the ruin praise can bring. In my heart, let it remain pure so your name will shine above all. Please continue to purify my heart. In Jesus name, Amen.

Listen to the song:

Quiet Morning

If anyone loudly blesses their neighbor early in the morning it will be taken as a curse. Prov. 27:14

My personality is sunny most of the time. So, I can be a little too much for others, especially when the new day dawns.

Years ago, I was having a conversation with an out-of-town guest. She teased me about my loud morning greetings and suggested I give her time for coffee to wake up a bit before spreading my sunshine (which would then have been well-received). And, for some reason this incident made me think about today’s verse.

To me, Prov. 27:14 is about obnoxious, morning people like me who need to tone down their morning sunshine. For all of us with such personalities, perhaps that would be wise. However, apparently, that is not what the verse says.

The foolish individual in the story is showing up in a parasitic attempt to put on an act. He gets up before anyone else (maybe to compete with others) and calls out a “blessing” to his neighbor (as early as possible) causing a stir among those watching.

Certainly, getting up and dressed and going out to relay such a noisy message would take a lot of motivation. Why would he go to such trouble? Possibly, his plan was to stay in front of the neighbor’s house all day (maybe this neighbor was wealthy). The foolish man was conspicuously loud, drawing the gaze of onlookers. His goal was either to impress them or to gain something from the neighbor through flattery. He seems endlessly blinded to the neighbor’s faults, so he would never confront or criticize. However, instead of a blessing, his loud accolades are bothersome and insulting because of the timing and the way he carries out his plans. Selfishness lies at the root of his praise. Prov. 27:14 sounds a lot like 27:6: “Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.”

Why would anyone be over-demonstrative and full of flattering words such as these? Do ‘I’ ever unknowingly do this? Why? To gain favor? To look good? To manipulate something more from my “neighbor?” To be liked?

We SHOULD give praise when it’s due, but not in a repetitive, groveling, ostentatious manner. It’s not appropriate for praise to be loud anyway unless to publicly honor a well-deserved soul. Over-praise can feel more like an insult than a compliment.

As the sun rises through my front window, the morning time is a chance to start my day by giving praise to God, the creator of the universe. It’s a time to reevaluate and prioritize my day as I listen to His voice. It is how I better thrive and flourish. I intentionally make my home quiet and worshipful for these moments.

Back in Bible days, if I was interrupted by loud compliments thrown at me by some selfish pest, who may have come yesterday and the day before that, it would have seemed terribly invasive, and it would have accomplished the opposite of what was intended.

In today’s time, my own temptation to invade the quiet of someone else’s home with noisy praise would be taxing on other’s emotions: “I am here to bless you (when in reality I want something from you).” I have failed, unintentionally, by doing this through untimely, overuse of texting, calling or e-mailing in moments of restlessness (when I should be tuning in to God). People have their own issues to face, quiet time to pursue and lives to live.

Honestly, God provides me with ALL I need. He is everything to me. I am throwing away precious moments with Him when I seek after fulfillment from others in ways that only God can provide, no matter the time of day, no matter the volume. A purer desire than manipulating my way into someone’s life would be to spend my energies, especially in the morning, on my knees to the Father.

Of course, encouragement is different than flattery or manipulating for gain. Encouragement is LOVE that takes the attention off oneself and brings inspiration and change to those around us. Encouragement is given mostly in private and in a respectful, timely manner or, again, in honoring a fellowman in front of others, not drawing attention to ourselves.

Also, consider something we’ve already discovered in previous blog posts: being the receiver of praise can be a tricky thing.

What would happen if I hungrily listened to the loud blessings of others and let the praise go straight to my head? What if the person blessing me was sincere with no other motive than to give me something good? The fact that it’s early in the morning would still be strange and bothersome, and the loudness of the blessing would simply embarrass me. But, forget all that for now. An expressive, effusive blessing can feel like a curse because it can result in the recipient becoming conceited or arrogant. He is being put on a pedestal far too high. Only God belongs in that place of perfection. No man should ever think he has a place there; for “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Rom. 3:23).

Praise is a wonderful gift when used to benefit or bless others, but it is not useful when the motive is to promote one’s own purposes. If you are being praised in such a manner, don’t buy into it. When you receive over-praise or selfish, loud praise, quietly (in your mind) turn it down and turn away. Even though “another man is praising you, and not your own mouth.” (vs. 2)

An abundance of praise is a temptation not to be absorbed into one’s heart. What was meant as a blessing can indeed become a curse.

Father, go to the deepest part of me and teach me something new about you. My greatest desire is to know you more. Teach me how to keep my motives in check when I loudly praise others. You alone deserve the truest praise from my lips. No one else, not me, not another. I am hungry, so hungry, for you. May I truly and selflessly encourage and uplift those around me. Uproot selfishness from me. Teach me how to deflect any glory I receive to your Holy name. Remind me every morning that my praise to you is never too loud! “But I cry to you for help, LORD; in the morning my prayer comes before you. (Psalm 88:13)” My prayers to you can never be too early or too late, and I am never a bother to you. Yet, develop in me a clean heart and pure motives to approach your throne of grace without simply using you to gain more. Help me to worship you with all my heart. In Jesus name, Amen.