Grab Hold of the Hand of God (Anger Series 9th of 9)

“I’M ANGRY!”
It’s a phrase I hear a lot these days.

Yet, I also hear and see many people who are sensing a bigger picture than the tension and stress they experience. They realize what is urgent in God’s eyes more than what is causing them anger. They don’t allow themselves to be distracted by feelings! School shootings brought one friend to her knees and moved her to form prayer groups instead of giving into defeat in her personal trials. Another friend sends out daily prayers for the President and our country. Several are constantly in their war rooms praying for their marriages instead of fighting their mates. Hearts are convicted to have compassion instead of self-pity. One hero of the faith is starting an online group for daily devotionals.

About 7 years ago, a new endeavor of mine was immediately followed by a heavy spiritual attack. I stood firm. Speaking in gentle compliance to what the situation called for, I marveled at the attempts of the enemy. Within 3 weeks, the situation righted itself without any help from me, other than my continued gentle responses. God took care of it and the new endeavor went forward in power, something that could have easily failed had I responded in my flesh.

Loving others can be painful. People let us down; they can’t always possibly be there when we need them. They may say the wrong things at times. They might move away or find new friends they like more than us. One day, they will leave us in death. Right now, without a doubt, they will at times make us angry.

Yet, I am witnessing Christian men and women refuse to hold back parts of themselves just because the pain of love is too big, too risky, or too invasive. They are refusing to allow themselves only to be the receiver of gifts of love, or to constantly be the one who sabotages other’s loving efforts towards them through nit-picking and arguments over every little thing. They no longer push people away, by saying, “You’re gonna leave me anyway; just get it over with!”

They dive into unconditional love (no matter that they are let down [I’m not talking about abusive situations] or that wrong things are said. They freely show thoughtfulness and connectiveness with no thought of having to be repaid. They grab hold of God’s hand and let Him lead them in how to love well. They spend their time refining their love more than any other skill. They concentrate on their part of loving by doing the hard work it takes. They stay in their marriages and fight the enemy (certainly, not all marriages survive; on the other hand many marriages revive on such a focus).

At times they wait in hopeful silence for loved ones to find their way back. Relationships, obviously, cannot be forced. They wait in prayer and anticipate the reunions and the warmth that once was there. They are committed for life, yet are surrendered to lean on God no matter what happens.

HATE is a horrible emotion that perhaps may be about deep hurt more than anything else. Apathy is the real enemy. Yet, it is being discovered by many that even apathy, along with hurt, are all able to be mended if even one pursues the hand of God more than over-needing or over-seeking the hand of the one who caused them hurt. It can all be mended (in God’s power) if pursuing the good of the other is there greatest joy.

These are examples that typically stir up anger in the deepest places of who we are. Yet, many heroes surround us who are taking the higher ground! They inspire us.

My husband shared the following. I thought it was pretty profound!
“I am good at expressing my Hallelujahs; but Psalms helps me express my hurts and my hates. Am I in a safe place? Maybe. I don’t know. But God IS the safe place to express my hates and anger and resentments… and my hurts until I can again say, ‘Hallelujah. Christ saves.’“
By Eugene Peterson

A friend shared this song with me that matches the sentiment of the quote and then I have a few more thoughts to follow:

God is the one to whom we may turn in times of anger and pain. If we ask Him, He will guide us in how to respond.

This has been a nine-week journey studying the topic of anger verses peace! Many tears were shed at the start of this study and even now as it draws to a close. The lessons both stunned and convicted me. God’s arrows went straight into my heart. But I didn’t want this to end with simply tears and conviction; I wanted my life to change forever. I wanted my actions to bubble up from the deepest God-places within me.

For now, let’s turn to the lesson for today. Father, go before this lesson and help it to teach me and help it to bless my readers.

In Genesis 4:2-7, we’ve covered a great deal about Cain’s countenance and what all that means, but what about God’s face? Don’t you think that God must have been amazed at Cain’s angry response? “Why are you angry? …If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; …you must rule over it.”
Can you picture the Father’s penetrating eyes and perplexed facial expressions as He spoke to Cain? Do you think God looks at us with the same bewildered look?

In Matthew 15:16, Jesus asked, “Are you still so dull?” (This was after Jesus had spoken a parable and His disciple Peter wanted an explanation.) Sometimes, I bow and shake my head and respond to Jesus, “I don’t want to be, but yes, sometimes, I am still so dull!‘

Yet, if God told me to “rule over my sin,” I would seek to please Him with my whole heart. Perhaps, however, I’m not so willing to take the higher ground in moments of hurt and anger. Those moments convict me; I’m really not as spiritual as I think I am. Am I willing to obey Him even in the hard times? (In the background, as I ask this question, the clock softly ticks, the dog barks in the distance; everything is so quiet. I let the silence convict me. I hear the voice of God deep in my heart of hearts.)

Again, I will share some quotes from the old commentaries:

Cambridge Commentary
“The passage illustrates the progress of sin in Cain’s heart. Firstly, disappointment and wounded pride, aggravated by envy of his brother, lead to anger; secondly, anger unrestrained, and brooding sullenly over an imaginary wrong, rouses the spirit of revenge; thirdly, revenge seeks an outlet in passion, and vents itself in violence and murder.”
[Imaginary wrongs have the worst affects on me than wrongs I actually see, feel and know. The enemy can have a field-day in my head, if I let him have control.]

Expositor’s Bible Commentary
“When Cain went in the joy of harvest and offered his first fruits no thought could be further from his mind than murder…Great sins are not so sudden as they seem. Familiarity with evil thought ripens us for evil action; and a moment of passion, an hour’s loss of self-control, a tempting occasion, may hurry us into irremediable evil. And even though this does not happen, envious, uncharitable, and malicious thoughts make our offerings as distasteful as Cain’s.”

“…to continue in sin you must put aside His [God’s] hand.”
(end of quotes)

Voices surround me; they say anger is unavoidable and people who control their tempers are dreary and unexciting. Life is more thrilling if I can tell the person off. Temper is deliciously luring! My flesh begs me to let my counterpart have it! Everything in me screams to let loose or to withhold myself in silent rage.

Before this study began, people shared with me how they dealt with anger. I was struggling with my own issues, and I remember looking up to the Heavens and crying out, “God, are you trying to speak to me through my friends? Is this truly what you want?“

But something in my gut simply didn’t feel right about their advice.
No one needs to teach me how to be angry. Getting angry is something I do well without any help. Anger is easy! In fact, I did anger quite well for 27 years. I said and did anything I felt like saying or doing. Those moments never produced fruit; it only corrupted me and my relationships.

At the point of coming to this new study, I honestly didn’t want the poison back in my body. I’m not afraid of standing in godly anger when the few situations call for it. When that happens, I step forward without hesitation.

I have taken nine weeks to passionately have my heart cleansed. Cleaning out anger can be brutally tough and even sometimes impossible after years of letting loose of my emotions. I’m still seeking to give God free reign in the deepest, secret places of who I am.

The soft, inner voice of God says, “Yield to me.” If I continue in sin anyway, I am “putting aside His hand.” Seeking an adrenalin rush in my need for a temper tantrum is absolutely turning my face away from the face of God.

I cannot simply say to the Bible writers, “Ruling over sin may work for you, but not for me,” or “The need to rule over sin is just your opinion.”

The Bible guides and blesses me when I follow God’s ways. Oh, how I want to understand how much I miss when I make my own rules or want to wish something into being right just because it’s my preference. God’s word isn’t simply a suggestion or an opinion. His word gives abundant, enthusiastic, inspirational life beyond all expectations my tiny brain can fathom.

I don’t want to waste energy on frivolous fights! Without that misuse of my time, I have infinite options and opportunities to open my heart to the real thrills and joys of life.

As I sit here in my current, challenging situations and pray, I openly attempt to hear what God has to say. I feel His desire for me to take the higher ground and to love people well (most times but not always producing obvious crops of fruit) and to trust God with the rest. I’ve lived through a life time of temper; anger doesn’t work. I want desperately to discover God’s love more than to incorporate better zingers, perfected hot buttons, and fine-tuned arrows in the hearts of people close to me.

I want to speak the truth but in God’s perfected and fine-tuned love. When God calls for rare anger, I’ll do it. No questions asked.

Getting out of that kiddy pool and into God’s deeper oceans takes time, determination, and moments of intense prayer. The study has led me to explore courageous, profound truths that seem infinite in count. Thank you, Jesus for walking with us all.

Oh Lord, I bow to you and seek your truth as I turn to you and your word to combat the lies the enemy speaks to my mind. I give my imaginary wrongs to you. They are placed on the altar. Help me to face the irritations and resentments in life before they get out of hand and rule over me. May I never put aside your hand, but grab hold of it and not let it go. I can’t do this life without you. Help me to see the bigger picture when angry situations arise and to get busy in your kingdom with the work you have in mind for me. In Jesus name, Amen.